And I quote

I told you that this weekend I talked to my 2 older sons about the birds and the bees. This isn’t something new. I have talked to them before about the differences between girls and boys etc, but never in such….depth…as we did on Sunday. The questions were flowing from the 8yo, and I had to get very specific about how the daddy gets the seed into the mommy. Cory, 11, was mortified. Just mortified. The funny part is how my 8yo applied his new found knowledge.

Monday morning he runs into the kitchen and with his usual flare for the dramatics, with lots of hand motions, declares that he knows the newts (aproximately 2-3 inches in length) that we have are male and female.

I said: “Hmm, okay, shoot. Tell us how you know this”
Cody: “Because I looked at them….you know…down there. And saw it!”
Me: “Saw what?”
Cody: “Well, one had a thing…down there…a penis (at saying this, he spread his hands about a foot apart). And the other one had an opening….a vagina”
Me: “You saw this….the newt penis and vagina. Did you have a magnifying glass”
Cody: “No way, I didn’t need it. Now maybe the male can get his pee-pee hard and plant his seed in the girl and we can have babies”

All the while Bill, with a horrified expression, had a spoon full of cheerios poised an inch away from his mouth, frozen in time.

Goooooooood morning honey!!!!!!!