and baby makes 6!

Work

Yesterday I went to my first day of work after being home for more than 3 years.

It was surreal to be in something other than shorts, and to talk with someone without them grabbing my face and yanking it around. People got up and went to the bathroom and I didn’t hear shouts of “mom, wipe my butt” and no one came out and dragged me by the hand to gaze down with admiration at their “big poo poo”.

Now, there is something called HIPAA, and I am a BIG advocate of patient confidentiality, so I will NEVER talk about my job on this blog. EVER. You may get “I am so tired” or “Man, I ran my butt off today” or “Work is fine. Work is great. I am completely fulfilled and well paid”. That will be it though. I just can’t go there. I have had my patient confidentiality violated before, so I know how it feels. Not to mention the newest blogger that was “Dooced”.

I will say this. I have NEVAH met a more friendly, accommodating group of people in all of my nursing career, and that is 12 years and counting. We can wear whatever color scrubs we want. We can wear Crocs (even the ones with holes). The best? We do self scheduling. You fill in the days you can work, and that is that. Un-freaking-real. The only rules are; closed toe shoes, we must wear socks or hose, and I must work 2 Saturday-Sunday shifts per month. No problemo.

The benefits and pay are unreal. Just unreal.

I feel intimidated by the unbelievable amount of new medications that have come out in my absence. Sheesh, how can I learn them all? Not to mention that the brain I once had, the one that could calculate drip rates in my mind and figure mg per ml on a moments notice, has been converted to a play back recorder primed with “Stop it” “No” “Get in here” “I said NO!” and “Who did this???” It is a very scary thing to be caring for, after a 3 year hiatus, a very ill human. I am quite sure that I have forgotten everything I learned and will surely ask my patients to sing the ABC song or to count to 10. I will refrain from clapping and exclaiming “YEAH!” when I see a big poo poo in the bedpan.

So, in a nutshell, I lurve my new job, but I miss my kids. I feel torn, and want to be home, but circumstances are such that this is a necessity.

Oh, and my big boo boo is healing nicely. I just pray that it is closed up by the time we hit the beach. I made it clear prior to the procedure that I would be in the ocean.

Dr. T: “Well, just make sure it is closed up. We don’t want an infection settling in”
Me: “Ah, but sea water is so healing, Tim!”
Dr. T: “Hmm, yes. Just don’t come home with Vibrio.”
Me: “No, probably just a few more skin cancers”

So, now I am freaked about Vibrio, as it is being reported along the coast.

Flippin’ Google.

**disclaimer…I can not be responsible for any spelling errors today, as my I think Tim must have pulled part of my brain out when he excised my lesion. That would explain the enormous incision that is going to scar like crazy. That, and I am too lazy to spell check this morning.