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Yesterday at work, I cared for a boy much the same age as my son Cody. He had to have emergency surgery, and while caring for him post op, all I could think about was my son. I pictured him in the same situation, and so I tried to care for him as if he were my own.
Last night when I came home, I showered and dressed for bed as usual, and Cody came into the room. He asked me if I had to go to work again in the morning and I told him, no, I did not. I informed him that I did not have to go back for 4 whole days. He smiled and hugged me, then ran out of the room.
After I had climbed into bed, he slipped in the room and snuggled into bed beside me. He hugged me tight and said “You are such a good mother.”
Stunned, I turned to him and said “Thank you so much Cody. Could you tell me what it is that makes me a such good mother to you?” and he replied “Because you are so nice to us, and you love us, and take care of us………and you are so much fun. I just love you.”
My day had been filled with self doubt and disappointment in myself for not being there for my kids. Anger at myself for working and spending so much time away from them. I had cried and cried in frustration as I drove to work in the dark at 6am, wanting so much to just be at home with my kids. To wake up to my daughter curled in my arms, and my husband with his arms around us both.
I have something to say to my son. The son who was so sick as a child, we thought he had leukemia. The son that I sat by the phone for, holding Bill’s hand in a death grip, waiting for the call from the oncologist to tell me whether his 15 month old blood had blasts in it… a tell tale sign of cancer.
The son who cried when I had my first miscarriage. He had named the baby Sarah already. I told him that we could name the next baby Sarah and he said “No, this baby was Sarah. There won’t be another Sarah”. He was 5yo.
The son who is never the first to let go when hugging.
You are such a good son, Cody. You are a good son because you have learned how to tell when someone needs a hug. You have learned how to be kind. What more could a mother want for her child?
A beautiful post Jody. Cody’s words were just what your heart needed to hear today…
That was beautiful.
You made me cry. So sweet.
What a beautiful post – and what an awesome mom you are … to be raising such incredible kids.
What a wonderful boy you have.
What a wise and loving boy you have. He knows things that others need a lifetime or more to learn.
What a beautiful post. What beautiful words your son spoke.
In our family we tell our kids three reasons why we love them each night. Not to long ago my son started doing it back to me. There is nothing better than knowing WHY your children love you.
He’s a keeper!
Beautiful post. Thanks for sharing!
Girl, so beautiful. Thank you for sharing that… perfect.
Wow, what a sweet boy.
what a beautiful post and what a wonderful son.
Thank you for writing it and for raising thoughtful, wonderful boys. As a mom of all girls it is lovely to see sensitive boys are out there.
You’re a wonderful mom.
Awesome. You’ve done good.
Love this post – love your blog. It’s filled with so much honesty. I am glad to have found it.
What a great post! I work a lot too, and I have the same feelings. I wonder if it is worth it, and I long to wake up with my family. Thank you for sharing your feelings, and showing what a wonderful son you have!
What a lucky mom you are to have such an intuitive little boy. I know you get a lot of the credit for who he is but you’ve got to feel so special and lucky too.
Thank you for being there for that other little boy too. I hope to never have to watch my child be taken away to surgery for anything, but I would want him to be cared for just as you did if the need arose.
That was one of the most touching posts I’ve ever read. You are really enticing me to find some property in South Texas!
You are so lucky to have him and he is so lucky to have you and isn’t it simply AMAZING htat no matter how badly we think we have totally screwed them over, they find the light, the specialness, the wonder in us and show it to us. They are all such incredible beings.
What a beautiful reminder of the good job you are doing.
Sounds like you’ve raised a pretty good son there. What a special little boy.
Cody read this post this evening.
He smiled and smiled. Then he gave me a hug, and again, I was the first to let go.
You are so lucky to have him! And remember, part of the reason he is the way he is, is because YOU are his mother!
Seems like you’re having a hard time adjusting to the working life, even though you love the job itself. ((HUGS))