Karma and her skanky cousin Mojo

They say that it comes in threes.

We are re-defining that little phrase, and I can only pray that it stops…as of yesterday evening. Please, already, STOP!

In 9 days time:

-Bill locked his keys in his truck while he was at work and spent hours fishing them out with a coat hanger because the police in town he works in do not have the tools to unlock car doors and given that my husband would prefer not to spend $125 on a locksmith, well, he fished for a very…long…time.

-the day Bill came home from work, the shower and bathtub backed up…..some mysterious toy lurking deep in the drain where Bill cannot reach it.

-that same day, the central air conditioner in the house went out. Air conditioning is required by law in every home in Texas. Without AC, people in Texas would melt. And die. And whine. South Texas ranks second to Arizona in AC dependance, and third to Florida in it’s ability to be so humid that people no longer require the use of a shower to wet themselves down for a bath. We just step outside and are dripping wet from head to toe in 10 seconds. We don’t need perms either. Curls and frizz come naturally to South Texas hair.

-that same evening, Bill took the van to run some movie rentals back and got stopped by a cop for a taillight being out. The same taillight that I had fixed a few weeks ago. Thank God we had not started the margaritas yet.

-Quinn, on his bike, without a helmet on for some unknown reason, launched himself off the front sidewalk into the street and only by the grace of God was he not hit. The steps he launched himself off are about 3 feet high off the asphalt. I was not there to watch this stunt…I would have turned immediatly gray. Bill was there, and he is bald now.

-I turned our taxes in, FINALLY, on Friday afternoon, and on Saturday morning our tax lady promptly died. SHE DIED. She has done our taxes for years, and she lived around the corner from us, so we were stunned and saddened to learn of her passing.

-Cory, while playing football, was hit in the head and cut his eye. His eye is very black and blue, and the cut quite deep, but by the time he got home from school Bill deemed it un-stitch worthy. This whole football thing is for the birds. Apparently the teachers think helmets are too.

-and I am hoping LAST…..yesterday afternoon I was in a car accident that caused the car I hit to spin around 180 degrees into oncoming traffic on the highway in front of my house. It was an elderly woman, and she was, thank God, not injured. It was totally my fault. Distracted. I did not run the stop sign, but looked right, then left, then took my checkbook out of my purse, glanced into the rearview mirror to make sure Mia was not climbing the fence at our house, and pulled in the road failing to check right again. I was crossing the road to go to the bank, and I hit the lady in the rear fender on the drivers side. I can’t find anything funny to say about this, because it still makes me cry to think about it. I was so worried about that lady, and still am. More about all that later.

I am supposed to be heading to the in-laws for Easter, but I am frozen in fear of driving on the highway with my 4 kids through San Antonio, given the week we have had. I mean, the Karma is just flooooooooooowing at our house this week.

I would rather just stay home, pad all the walls and nail the doors and windows shut.

****Update! As I was wrapping up my post at 5am, Quinn walked into the bedroom in a full blown croup/asthma attack. Lucky for me, we are in South Texas and I don’t need to do the whole shower/steam thing. I just open the back door and voila! a sauna is born. The problem is, a cold front made it’s way south because Chris told it to, and now all of our lovely humidity is gone and I no longer have a 24/7 croup tent in my backyard and must depend on the shower for steam today. The same shower that is plugged. Karma, baby.